Good ol’ Valentine’s Day.
If you happen to be in a long term relationship when this annual corporate scam rolls around, then you are well aware of your obligation to bend to annoying social norms such as buying flowers, chocolates, and other romantic crap that will either die or be consumed within a week’s time. After obligatory gifts have been distributed, next comes an evening out to an expensive restaurant packed to brim with couples in varying stages of their relationship. Most of which don’t seem to be particularly enthused with their choice of partner sitting across the table from them. They struggle to produce conversation while realizing they have completely run out of things to say to each other. You may notice a minority of couples who seem to be enjoying themselves. This is due to one of two things. Either the relationship is still relatively new, or the man knows how to lead a relationship to sustain long term interest and excitement. It’s usually the former.
If you’re a post-grad 20-something and commitment-free (congrats on being smart), you get to spend the day doing whatever the hell you want. If this is the V-Day scenario that you find yourself in, then good for you. Cupid’s Birthday can easily be turned into one of the best holidays of the year.
First and foremost, I like to take a few moments and appreciate the freedom I’ve managed to retain over the course of my fleeting youth.
A five second scroll through the Facebook news feed is all that’s needed to observe a harrowing barrage of pitfalls I’ve managed to avoid thus far. Clicking down through the page, I see a steady flow of men in the prime of their lives married to women of questionable fidelity and ever increasing body mass index. Facebook has made it abundantly clear that marriage is a license for many people to let themselves go.
Then come the babies. I see a picture of an old wingman from my college years sticking a milk bottle into his fussy newborn’s mouth. He manufactures a ear to ear grin for the camera and garners 50+ likes on the photo.
While I do believe it’s the natural progression of life to one day have children, I’m tempted to comment, “You’re in your 20’s dude.. you have the rest of your life for that shit!”
I fear one day I will login to Facebook and see my friend divorced; required to pay alimony to a woman who now fucks other men, and child support to a kid he gets to see one day every other week.
A man must spend his young adulthood free of family commitment to work on himself and gear up for his prime. Especially in this modern dating culture we find ourselves in.
A man is best served to commit his 20’s to the practice of non-commitment.
In this day and age, to have a successful and happy relationship, the modern man MUST develop a high level of experience with the “fairer” sex. This can only be achieved through the study of game and a decade long pursuit of pussy.
Gone are the days where you can find a nice trustworthy girl simply through being a good guy, having good friends, and snagging a good job. The nice guy approach leads to a relationship with a woman who makes the rules and fucks around on the side.
Feminism coupled with technology (Smartphones,Tinder, Bumble, Instagram, etc.) have opened the floodgates of promiscuity and have enabled women to passively pig out on a buffet of tall handsome men.
Your relationship is always one swipe or DM away from infidelity. Technology opens the door for endless casual sex and feminism encourages women to walk through it.
This puts long term relationships in a troublesome state.
You must become a certain type of man and play a certain role to have a successful relationship. And you won’t achieve that by “just being yourself”.
They don’t teach this shit in school.
It is imperative that a man spends years of his life gaining experience and learning how to be the type of man who can lead a relationship and sustain long term attraction and interest. We live in a world of too many options. A world where a man will be promptly divorced because “the feeling just wasn’t there anymore” or they were “stuck in a rut”.
In the 21st century, a man who commits when he is young and inexperienced is doomed to divorce.
So when Valentine’s Day rolls around, I take a minute to appreciate my current standing in life. Instead of conforming to a life of husbandly servitude that society had planned for me, I’m spending these years working on myself, elevating my station in life, and making sure I have the proper mindset firmly in place if the day comes where I choose to commit again.
After I’ve spent some time on Valentine’s Day being grateful for my fortunate bachelorhood, I like to pick out one of my city’s novelty bars to spend the evening. You know those bars that have a reputation for being a late night spot you typically go to after 2AM for a guaranteed weird night. These bars always bring in some lonely single talent on V-Day.
“So have you found the man of your dreams here yet” is usually a good ice breaker in a novelty bar.
Perhaps one day I’ll once again find myself in a relationship on this holiday where men are told they need to do all these things for their woman. If that day comes, at least I know I’ll have the necessary framework to be the guy at the restaurant table having a charismatic conversation with a girl lusting after him.