The concept of courtship is mostly dead in modern millennial dating, and for good reason. Why invest more time and energy than what is needed? The observant player is an expert in gauging how much work is required to lay any given girl (in most cases just some basic text game and 1-2 drinks dates).
The Beta will eagerly line up to take any and every girl out to a
romantic boring dinner, shower her with complimentary affection, and spoil her with treatment undeserved, most likely to result in having his wallet sucked dry. The interaction slowly fizzes out as his pursuit of her fails. The Alpha is a pro at spotting a girl’s self-determined worth and level of discretion. He will not invest more in her than what she requires of other men. He employs low-investment Game, either natural or learned, most likely to result in having his dick sucked dry. The interaction slowly fizzes out as he fails to care to pursue her.
It’s normally not this black and white, but what I’ve illustrated above is a very general portrait of the state of millennial dating. And it all goes back to the timeless adage – Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?
However, there are a few times in every man’s life when he stumbles across something worth a second glance. Something that demands a larger investment while showing promise of a worthwhile return. Not your everyday micro-loan, penny stock, or blue chip that any chump investor can cash in on.
It’s a rare thing in the 21st century, but once every 3-5 years a player may cross paths with a woman who sees value in being more selective and prudent in her sexual decision making. And as it would happen, this girl may also combine these discretionary qualities with an attractive feminine charm and just enough wit and humor to keep things interesting without being over-the-top.
After years of slayin’ hoes in the Game, a player can sometimes get a little too excited when he makes headway with a girl who stands out from the others in the ways mentioned above. A girl that he never would have pulled before his newly acquired superpowers came to be, can all too easily derail a man from the attractive persona that drew her to him in the first place.
The great shortcoming of the aughts PUA culture was that it mostly ignored what to do post-seduction if you’re interested in a successful long-term relationship. As a result, thousands of men went on to learn just enough Game to seduce a dating-material girl only to revert back to full betatude a few months in and watch the relationship slowly crumble (myself included).
If you learn only one thing today, let it be this: The Game never stops.
You must always have self-awareness and behavior cognizance at the ready. You must regulate your emotions, maintain frame, and keep tight grip on your behavior. You are after all, a man.
Rule 1: Affection Must Be Earned
After the attraction has been established, if it’s your prerogative, you can slowly let her win your affections and wear you down over time. In modern era, it’s preferable for most Earned Affection to occur post-sex, but if she’s the ideal type of long-term partner who demands some form of commitment from all men before penetration then you may not have that option.
Your affection must always be extracted on a slow-release, never handed out in large amounts. You make her work for that little sliver of Beta living inside you over a period of several months while taking care to maintain Interest Equilibrium. Ensuring your interest in her never exceeds her interest in you, or even better, fostering an Interest Surplus from her in you. Some may call this the upper hand. Acquire it and wield it responsibly. This is courtship at its core. And courtship is the foundation of your relationship. It must always follow a similar model for long-term success.
It’s not a Disney story, but it works.
It seems to happen that on average, once every 3-5 years or so I hit it off with a girl who fits the bill for commitment.
The interaction always starts out with her getting the exact same Game as any other hoe. I get her out and push for sex on the first date, hoping she will deny me, while also casually letting it appear I’m not that judgmental if a girl fucks around a lot (a necessary facade in the beginning). If she has in fact only been with less than say, 6 men, sometimes a virgin, then the night ends with me jerking off and planning out what fancy hotel bar our 2nd date will be at.
No successful relationship ever started with a man fawning over a woman, giving out his affection that means nothing to her because it has not been earned. I cannot think of a better demonstration of a weak man suffering from a lack of options. And that’s exactly the impression she will get as well. If you demonstrate this approach on a hoe, you may catch her at a time in her life where she thinks this type of nice guy behavior may actually be what she needs after years of riding bad boy cock. With a relationship-worthy girl, she’ll just throw you in with all the other chumps who were happy to get down on their knees and polish her pussy pedestal to a glossy spitshine without even knowing what she’s really like.
To keep her affection, you must make her earn yours.
Rule 2: You Cannot Be In Search Of Monogamy
Don’t settle down and commit until you’ve had sex with at least 20 girls. As a man, you are charged with leading your relationships. To do this successfully, you need to gain a certain level of experience that only comes with bedding a score of women. There is also something to be said for the confidence you will internalize knowing you can go out and pull whenever you want. There is only so much that books and blogs can do for you. Reading is not a substitute for living.
You need a few years to be single in the Game to get your mind right, work on yourself, learn, and elevate your station as a man. It’s also worth mentioning that women should be a byproduct of your life.. always. Whether you’re living up the playboy lifestyle or are ready for something more meaningful, you should always have a life mission that is greater than just fucking hoes, getting married, or anything in between.
You must be a man must be living up his prime, loving life, enjoying freedom, lifting his status, and having the women flock to him. If this isn’t you, then you’re not ready for a relationship.
Get yourself to that level so when you do finally stumble across that unicorn, you’ll have the Game, experience, and knowledge to get her.. and keep her. Every successful relationship is born from some version of this dynamic.
It’s ideal for her to have reservations about you and make no attempt to hide the fact that you seem “kind of like a player”.
No apologies when she hits you with that inevitable accusation. There’s a classic little bit where you respond by joking you have an opening for her to be your 8th sidepiece or something along those lines. Or if you’d prefer to respond in a more serious manner then “I do meet a lot of girls but I don’t know if I would call myself that. Player’s lie. I don’t lie about my life” will do.
It is imperative that she has this perception of you in the beginning. You’re the guy who has a multitude of options and no intent of trading your glorious lifestyle to give up freedom for any old hoe. She must see you as valuable and desirable to others. You are a goal for her to get. Deep down, something primal makes every girl want to tame a player. If she proves to be something special, you can give her that opportunity.
These are two clear-cut rules of courtship. I did not write them. But careful observation, a skeptical mind, and harsh abandonment of what I want to believe has led me to see them as the truth and expose the original author of these rules to be basic human nature. And nature is under no requirement to live in harmony with our ideal image of the world.
It is up to you to see this as positive or negative. Practical or Manipulative. Personally, it gives me relief and happiness to know that it is possible to learn the rules of the Game and thus have a better shot at navigating life and relationships. It seems those who do not follow the rules fare much worse.